I started to record a video yesterday talking a little about my personal experience with Mental Health. I refrained from posted it because I felt a blog would be best to talk about my journey and explain my personal struggle, how I have dealt with it and what has helped me. I want to reach out to anyone who may be suffering with it and I would like to share my healing process. I will not go into all the details of my trauma, but I will share the details of what helped me cope.
Everyone's experience of trauma is unique, for me I had episodes of worthlessness, feeling empty, shock, fear, anxiety, anger, etc... Not knowing how to deal with all those emotions all at once had my brain very confused, tired and obviously not thinking right. I felt life was not worth the pain. At the time I felt there was no way out, life was not worth living.
Trauma can have a significant impact on the brain, I did some research because I needed to know for myself why I was feeling the way I was. Why could I not control it? Why did I need medication to help me cope? Here are some of the ways trauma can affect the brain:
Altered amygdala function: The amygdala is the part of the brain responsible for processing emotions and detecting potential threats. Trauma can cause the amygdala to become overactive, leading to increased fear and anxiety.
Changes in prefrontal cortex function: The prefrontal cortex is the part of the brain involved in decision-making, problem-solving, and impulse control. Trauma can impair the prefrontal cortex's ability to function properly, leading to difficulties with these cognitive processes.
Hypervigilance: Trauma can cause the brain to be constantly on high alert, leading to hypervigilance, which is a state of being extremely sensitive to potential threats.
Reduced hippocampal volume: The hippocampus is the part of the brain responsible for memory formation and recall. Trauma can cause the hippocampus to shrink in size, which may contribute to problems with memory and the ability to learn new things.
Increased cortisol levels: Trauma can lead to an increase in cortisol, a stress hormone that can have negative effects on the body and brain when produced in excess.
It does take time to recover, the brain is capable of recuperating and adapting after experiencing trauma. It has a remarkable ability to change and reorganize itself and with the help of therapy it makes a huge difference. I would not recommend recovery on your own. Therapies that may help are psychotherapy, cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR), and other evidence-based interventions. Luckily I had access to all of these and a wonderful therapist who was helping me on a weekly basis at first, then I was weaned off when I felt I had all the tools to help me cope.
The two main struggles for me was #' 4 & 5. Memory and recall of particular things was blurred ( some things should be forgotten anyway), and the increased cortisol levels.
The key to recovery is patience, and along with that is a a good therapist ( as I mentioned before), family, friends, spouse and even support groups. You are NOT alone in this, there is help. Another thing that helped me a lot was Reiki and seeking spiritual help. We are more than just this, realizing and accepting our journey is key to recovery. Let me touch a little on the Reiki. The first time I had Reiki, it did nothing for me. I had no idea what to expect and I was very uneasy about it. The second time I had to really open up to it and open my heart. I wanted to help myself get rid of the darkness that surrounded me. During the session I felt a release, a weight was lifted off my shoulders and my head felt clear. The feeling of protection came upon me and after a few sessions I felt invincible. My Reiki Master (Max) who also happens to be my partner :) taught me a lot. Who knew that hugging a tree and thanking it for helping me release my problems would help? Who knew that walking barefoot into a park, standing there grounding myself (ask for details on this one, you'll be amazed) would help? Who knew meditation would help? We are all connected, we are energy and the more of the "good" energy we release, we open the door for healing. Healing not just ourselves but others as well.
Everyone has struggles, whos doesn't these days? Trauma is tough to overcome and it does impact you for life, it does not go away. What does go away is how you perceive it. I look at it this way;
1. I needed to discover my own strengths which helped me build confidence.
2. I needed to discover my voice. I now know what I stand for and what I have to offer to the world.
3. I needed to discover my own beliefs. I have a place in this world and I want to experience it.
4. I needed to learn to never be co-dependent of anyone. You live a more fulfilling life.
5. We have soul contracts...some were never meant to be!
LEARN WHO YOU ARE...NOT WHAT OTHERS WANT YOU TO BE.
This song got me thru a lot...take a listen, you may like it also.
I hope my experience has shed some light .
Hugs,
Lucia
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